Deep thoughts.

Recently I've been posting most of my thoughts during the day on Plurk or Twitter but I thought I'd recap a few of the ones that crack me up here.

• Hubby brought home roses last night and took me to dinner. Love that man of mine!
  
• There is a cricket in the kitchen at work. If that weren't bad enough I've been told it escaped from the LIZARDS upstairs.
  
• Road Trip Note #1: Sonic is the new McDonald's of the 2000's - there's one on EVERY corner.
  
• Road Trip Note #2: Lake of the Ozarks has ZERO Starbucks - WIN!
  
• Things that are awesome: A cedar cabin with a metal roof in the middle of a huge thunderstorm and downpour.
  
• Knitting round and round on my sweater with this playing in my head.
  
• Nothing says summer like fresh homemade pico de gallo!
  
• It just doesn't get better than this:
  
  

Oh what a night.

I have pictures of knitting, which will be posted soon, but first I have a story.

I was rudely awoken this morning around 4:30 when I quite literally FELL OUT OF BED.

Yes you read that right. I rolled over to find myself crashing to the floor. I also apparently had a death grip on the covers and took them all with me. So hubby woke up to a great big thump and all his covers being ripped off of him.

I'm fine - in fact I'm lucky. Other than being a little sore, I managed not to hit my head on either the nightstand or the huge trunk of yarn next to the bed. My pride? Slightly wounded.

And yes, I laughed about it all day.

You may return to what you were doing now.

I'm a riot.

Sometimes I amaze myself.

For instance, today I opened Google News feeds and gasped when I [mis]read the following headline:

President Obama remarks on Specter changing Panties

Not to be outdone I received the following caution this afternoon:

Swine Flu No-No

Eureka!

I have finally found it, my friends. Quite possibly the most perfect white elephant gift ever:


I mean, who couldn't love this rooster?

Brought to you courtesy of everyone's favorite neighborhood department store.

I resemble that remark.

I have alternately been laughing at and identifying with this cartoon since Ndef sent it to me earlier this week:



Real credits and copyright go here.

It's like Ohmigod!

You can say many things about me. I possess many talents. Gardening, however, is not one of them. In fact I'm spectacularly bad at it. Since moving to Kansas City, you might say that I have a one way relationship with potted plants and cuttings, one of virtually assured destruction.

My only briefly successful foray into the growing world was the Aerogarden escapades of this past spring/summer. And I have to say it was kind of cheating. It was grow lights, water, prepackaged seed pods and food pellets.

Last weekend Wes and I decided to try our hand at growing again. We spent a little while at Home Depot pondering our options and ended up with a Burpee Grow Kit. The kit comes with a plastic tray, a watering system (reservoir and absorbent mat), and some "magic" dirt pellets (they expand when you add water). At the end of the evening our newest project looked like this:


We planted a variety of vegetables and herbs. From our previous experience we expected the herbs to sprout within a 7-10 days and be ready for harvesting and transfer within 4-6 weeks. From reading the vegetable packets, we expected our plants to be transferable in about 6 weeks and mature in 60-90 days. We reasoned that this would be at earliest, March, and at lastest April, perfectly warm.

A mere 6 days later, this is what we have:


Those there on the left are the BEANS OF DOOM with root systems already OUTSIDE the plastic tray. In the middle you can see a melange of tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots and onions. Those big sprouts on the right are the broccoli.

Not much action from the herb section:


Apparently the hubs and I are genius gardeners huh? We're also in SERIOUS trouble.

Happy Holidays!

Ralphie and I wish you and yours a very merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah and a wonderful New Year!

Letters to the Editor

Dear California:

Thank you for the lovely weather during the Thanksgiving holiday. Although some folks like their Thanksgivings to be nippy, I loved our long walk through 70 degree sunshine on Thursday afternoon.

I also have to thank you for your lack of traffic during the holiday weekend. Other than getting in and out of the airport you were an absolute delight. Let's see more of that m'kay?

Love,
The Little Devil

*****

Dear Kansas -

You were lovely when we left - 50s and 60s and sunny. WHAT happened? Now you're spitting snow upon us. I hope you know that I'm not planning to leave my house until you get a better attitude. No matter how long it takes.

Icily yours,
The Little Devil

*****

Dear Smoking Man -

When I arrived home from Thanksgiving week last night, fresh from beautiful sunny California to snowy, icy Kansas, I was already a little disappointed in my homecoming. Add to that the fact that it was midnight, I had no heavy coat with me (please see letter to Kansas above for reasons) and that the Blue Bus took over a half an hour to arrive. So please understand me when I say I really didn't need you to chain smoke through the waiting period and hack that terrible cough in my ear forcing me to HAVE to take an extra shower at 2am just so I could go to sleep without smelling like your ash tray. You could learn a bit of common courtesy about standing away from crowds of people when you feel the need to indulge in your disgusting habit. Because really, if I ever see you again, I'm going to have to resist the impulse not to ash directly on you.

-The LD

*****

Dear Family and Friends:

Thanks for the fabulous time. I miss you all and enjoyed seeing you and sharing wonderful meals. Photographic evidence is below.

Random Tweets

• Whoever started calling the Point of Service system the POS either had a great sense of humor or absolutely zero intelligence.
  
• Sweet jeebdus I need a real job so I can shop at yarn stores as a profession.
  
• My husband is an amateur carpenter and turns water into wine. Did I marry Jesus?
  
• I should go to the DMV, but the couch looks much more inviting and less filled with freaks.
  

If you want to see more, you can follow me here.

A picture is worth.... hmmm...

Last weekend Wes and I stopped by Dillon's to pick up a few groceries and were astonished to see THIS in the toy vending machines:



Apparently THAT'S what they do with leftover campaign merchandise once the election is over. And how's that for a pretty crappy rendition of McCain?

What's even funnier than this, is that last night at our girls' soiree Jo Minor piped up "you're NEVER going to believe what I saw at Wal-Mart!" We both whipped out our handy-dandy cell phones and compared photos. You can see hers here (when she posts it there will be a link!).

Just in case you didn't know...

According to this source: The American Medical Association says that texting while driving is bad.

With all deference to Daddy DevilWorks who is a physician, and an upstanding member of the AMA, I think we have to thank the AMA for their OBVIOUS COMMON-SENSE wisdom. (Dr. Obvious anyone?) Any thing else we should know about?

P.S. Thank you H Enthusiast for giving me a good laugh and adding your own perspective:

"The AMA also concluded that running with scissors, putting forks in wall outlets and sticking your tongue on a frozen light pole are also bad."

My next career?

You too can be a Jedi Knight.

Like a Train Wreck

Being back at a temp job means that I once again have time to surf the web. However, it is my wonderful friend PlazaJen who brought this little gem to my attention. In the market for a lovely piece of real estate? Check out the Lovely Listings!

The answer to life, the universe and everything.

Los Angeles, CA - Douglas Adams fans were shocked today to learn that the answer to the life, the universe and everything was not, in fact, 42, but rather the sage advice of California lawmakers: hands free. "It's a whole new world!" one young woman exclaimed. She declined to have her real name published here, but noted that this should "definitely increase her knitting time whilst in traffic."

Deep thoughts for the day.

From my favorite AWAD:

It is better to have loafed and lost than never to have loafed at all.

-James Thurber, writer and cartoonist (1894-1961)


And from the illustrious Huffington Post:


And The Biggest Procrastinators Are...usually the most sophisticated, sensitive, creative and intelligent people.

Nailed you, did I? Well, I assume you're in the sophisticated, creative and intelligent category. (I'm guessing that there are only a very few thick dullards who cruise this site.) That probably means you have large numbers of things stuck in your mind, in your briefcase, and on your desk about which things are not moving forward quite as consistently as they could be.

Major reason: the precise next physical visible activity (next action) has probably not been decided on the to-do's. The bright people usually have some sort of reminders about their projects and things to do on lists, in piles, or lying around, so they won't forget to think about their commitments. Bully. But every time they catch the briefest glimpse of any of them, they instantly race forward in their mind, rapidly and intelligently creating images of all the possible pieces that have to fit together and all the things that might have to be involved in getting them to happen and all the possible negative consequences if any one of them slips (and all the things that they might be forgetting in all this!) Whew. Freaked themselves right out. I'd quit, too.

A quick funny.

Found this in Target the other day. Thought my bacon-loving friends would appreciate it. $9.99 at Target in Overland Park for those who can't live without a sunny egg and bacon smile.

Off in the thunderstorms of Kansas this weekend. Will return on Monday!

Gone Kayaking

We spent this weekend down at my inlaw's, sleeping late, relaxing and of course, kayaking (now that it's spring and warming up). I got almost no knitting done, but I got to spend lots of time with my sweetie and get to enjoy one of his favorite things to do. The lake was beautiful, the weather was warm and my arms are tired. But it was a good trip.


Wes contemplates a snack at picnic table.








And no road trip would be complete without one of these. Wes calls this "Oh my effen ugly!"

Friday funny.

I have no good words for this, only hysterical laughter.



Forwarded to me from my crafty friend of a friend S. and found here.

What a day!

1. Things I never, ever, EVER thought I would say:

Target sucks...where the hell is Wal-Mart?

2. Things I learned today:

Always read the pattern through before you begin knitting. ESPECIALLY when you think there must be something wrong with the pattern because it's probably YOU.

3. Things I laughed at today:

Crazy Aunt Purl's photo - I laughed for hours. God I miss California.

4. Things I'd put on a tee shirt today:

If my eyes are open, I'd rather be knitting.

5. Things I made today (for a coworker) that might make me die of cuteness:

Fridgeline: January 21, 2008

I recently wrote about the dilemma of being a woman living alone and trying to sell items via Craiglist. I might add that these days it seems the only people who buy items off of Craigslist are of the frosted flake variety. Approximately 2 weeks ago I put my fridge up for sale on Craiglist. I immediately got bombarded with emails. About half of those wanted to buy it at the price I listed, and the other half offered to take it off my hands for $100. I started making appointments with those who wanted to buy it at list price. After getting stood up not once, but TWICE (and having Knitmeister S sit with me one afternoon) I decided to give up on my dream price and let one of the cheaper guys have it. I had a nice email correspondence with one who said he'd show up this morning. And then he stood me up. GRRRR...

Luckily I had saved the emails from others. I started a flurry of correspondence and once gentleman offered to come by this afternoon. I was skeptical, but decided to give it one more try before I called Salvation Army and begged them to take it away. About 10 minutes ago my phone rang and a nice landlord was outside, ready to take my fridge away for his apartment complex. A crisp $100 bill later, and I now have a distinct lack of fridge in my apartment. Thanks heavens! Happy trails to you old buddy.