Oh the headlines!

Today I will collect all the amusing headlines I can find. Check back for updates and feel free to add your own in the comments!

PS These are real headlines found on the likes of Yahoo News, CNN, etc. I will NOT be including any from The Onion.

1. Man Has Cardiac Arrest at Cardiologist Ball - Bet that came as a surprise to everyone.

2. Australian whale vomit find worth a fortune - Maybe if it was in the shape of Jesus? Or the Virgin Mary.

3. 8 Nabbed for No Pants Subway Ride in N.Y. - I discussed this yesterday. What exhibitionism!

4. Plane passenger executes bite-and-run then jumps - Like we don't have enough to worry about when flying.

5. Groping breasts and other adventures - Mmmm other adventures...

6. Kevin Federline Tries His Hand at Rapping - As opposed to what? Loafing? Spending?

7. Government support for mail-order brides - It's a sad commentary when the government wants to provide lonely farmers with Mail Order brides.

8. Britney, Trump and the Pox - Your latest gossip on how Britney and Trump bring the Pox to the world. We always knew she was nasty.

9. How to Squelch Your Inner Jackass - There are so many people I could recommend this to, but I'd probably be out of a job.

10. We're Pigs in Space - Well I've heard of the lack of gravity, but I didn't think it gave us snouts.

11. Bat Love Life, Size Does Matter - Hey baby, how big is your bat?

12. Runway Surprise: Where's my Flight? - As opposed to Runway Surpise - she's not wearing underwear!

13. Crime Blotter: Strippers Cop a Plea in Spanking Case - 'Nuff said.

14. Full Coverage: Heaven - Get the lastest on the news in Heaven, St. Peter's mood, who's ahead in sports the Angels or the Demons, and what your commute to the Pearly Gates looks like...