Processing

My processing speeds seems to be down a bit lately. I experienced the following today and I am not sure what to make of any of them:

* Despite being told I have no leadership skills and am not qualified to be promoted, the Exec Director dropped my name several times today during the staff meeting - mostly praise for helping with our website redesign, bring BIG new business to the organization, and representing our interests on campus. This is simultaneously good for the self esteem (clearly I am having an impact) and yet another blow (actions speak louder than words, and so far there are no actions).

* My intended found his dream job today. It's a great opportunity and his eyes lit up as he told me about it. I'm so happy for him and I love him so much and want this for him with every fiber of my being. The job is in Omaha. I have no idea what I will do in Omaha.

* I am heading north this weekend to the Bay area. The primary purpose of this trip is to attend one of my best friend's baby shower. This is the first one of my friends to have a baby. I am ecstatic for her. I am also loving planning my wedding. I know that life is not a race, but I feel behind somehow. Not that I'm ready for children at this point in my life. While in the Bay area, I will also catch up with a group of friends with which I was very close in college and immediately thereafter, but haven't seen in two years.